
How to Get Things Really Flat: Enlightenment for Every Man on Ironing, Vacuuming and Other Housekeeping Duties
by Andrew Martin
Publisher: The Experiment
Publication Date: September 1, 2009
ISBN: 9781615190027
240 Pages
Nonfiction: Self-Help
Summary & Review:
Because this title is marketed to men, I couldn't resist browsing through it in the library to see if it had any cleaning tips or tricks I hadn't heard of. I was also curious to see if it was insulting to men or truly helpful.
The format of How to Get Things Really Flat is very informal and chatty, and manages to impart basic cleaning information with such a nice balance of humor that you don't feel like you are reading a cleaning manual, so much as one man's journey to not only help his wife with the cleaning, but understand why certain methods work better than others.
With headings like: Household Aesthetics: A Brief Introduction for the Tasteless Man, it's obvious that How to Get Things Really Flat is the antithesis of a run-of-the-mill cleaning encyclopedia. I have seen cleaning encyclopedias before that are so overwhelming in their vast array of information that I wouldn't know where to start to implement all of the methods listed. How to Get Things Really Flat, however, is filled with funny cleaning anecdotes from the author's life and interesting trivia. It entertains; imparting valuable tips about household chores while managing to avoid insulting men or women.
I thought it was interesting that the author found during his research, that some of women that he talked to about cleaning were not much more informed about cleaning than he was. He also addresses the stigma that cleaning has both for men and women, stating that, "There is almost as much of a stigma attached to the woman who demonstrates a knowledge of cleaning as there is to the man who does." (Page 103)
And just for fun, here are a few of my favorite quotes:
My own wife spends the whole of Christmas Eve cleaning, while playing Christmas carols very loudly on a portable CD player. It’s all 'Peace on earth, and mercy mild,' but if you get in her way, you’re dead." (Page 159)
"And don’t climb stepladders and lean out precariously in order to dust high shelves, because that’s just another way the dust mites have of killing us all." (Page 93)
In addition to learning some new housecleaning tips, I also enjoyed seeing cleaning tasks from a man's point of view. The author is English, and some of his stories include bits of information about English culture of which I was unaware.
Tips range from the basic (if your vacuum cleaner does not have great suction it's probably time to change either the filter or the bag) to more advanced (like which vacuum cleaner attachments work well for which jobs). I lack a certain amount of common sense when it comes to some cleaning jobs, so I was excited to learn some easy new tips. Now I know that instead of feeling guilty about not dusting the blinds (because the duster never seems to get all of the dust off anyway) I can use the upholstery attachment to vacuum the dust away.
There is also a section on eco-friendly cleaners such as baking soda, lemon juice, and vinegar and some of their possible uses. I look forward to testing a few of them out in the near future.
I enjoyed reading How to Get Things Really Flat, and found myself laughing out loud in many parts. If you already know a lot about how to clean your house from top to bottom then this might not be the book for you. This would; however be a great book for newlyweds, or men who are living on their own for the first time.
Rating: 4/5
About the Author:
Andrew Martin trained as an attorney before becoming a journalist and novelist. A regular contributor to the Guardian, he has also written for the Daily and Sunday Telegraph, the Independent and Granta, among many other publications. His seven novels include five titles — beginning with The Necropolis Railway — featuring the young Edwardian detective, Jim Stringer. He has also written short stories and radio plays. He lives with his wife and two children in London.



















